“It is not good for the man to be alone…” Hallelujah! Speak it sister…
Marriage is meant to be a defining moment, a transition, from one state to the other. It earns you ‘bragging’ rights. You can now walk at a romantic angle, develop a public opinion, for men, etc… you know them… But of course, this happens if you transit for and with good reasons, which are countless.
However, many people are marrying and getting married, for fake, lose, unthinkable indefensible, and wishful reasons. Here are just but a few. The list is undoubtedly inexhaustible:
#1 All my friends are getting married. This is perhaps the most fatal reason threatening the society today. You are receiving wedding invites weekly, and reading JUST MARRIED status of your close friends on Facebook repeatedly.
Then there are those ill-mannered friends who will always ask when you are inviting them. Do you remember asking them to marry? Do not succumb to pressure. After all, they will not help you to maintain and service your spouse.
#2 Am too old – It is laughable when you meet under 30s calling themselves ‘nyanya mzee’ or Guca and incorrectly justifying why they are dying to marry. While age could be a ‘genuine’ push and pull factor for people to get married, just have in mind that even married people age.
#3 Ladies/Men will get finished. Idiot! Who lied to you that men and women get finished? You can’t deplete them. There is always someone for everyone.
#4 She is pregnant – Pregnancy should not be a reason to get married to a guy or marry a lady in the name of saving your image. You’d rather lose that image, (if at all you have it) now than getting into marriage for the wrong reason. What happens when the lady gives birth? Does the marriage die? Do you impregnate her again so that you can save the union?
#5 She will be taken – If she is willing to get married to another person while you are in the equation, then you have no future together. Let each other loose and go your ways.
#6 My parents want grandchildren – Parents have an advisory role in our lives. But they will not always prevail. You never summoned them to give birth to you or to get married in the first place. Talk and let them understand your priorities plus why you are ‘buying time.’
#7 Show off – if you marry to brag to your peers, workmates and everyone around you, you are doomed. The same people you brag to will be laughing at you sooner than you could perhaps imagine.
#8 I now have a job. Well, does it mean jobless beings shouldn’t marry and get married? What happens when the job ends? A good job or a job for that matter is simply a survival tool and not a reason you should marry. History is replete with men and women who are either working or jobless and are married or single.
Marriage does not validate who you are. The magic is not in getting married, the magic is in staying married.
If truly you cannot live another day on earth without that person, then you need to get married.